Broken Barriers

TinTin Ferraris
Oct 31, 2017
9 min read

Its been two weeks since my first ever single's camp and I know, this might be a little late blog. But forgive me for I have been in two trips with just two days apart. Exhausting? Definitely yes. Did I drown in pile of workload after I got back? Well, that's another big YES. I actually couldn't find the time to write this, but then the experience was just too amazing not to be shared. *wink*

Let me just give you a little bit of background on how I got into this camp. I almost didn't get in. A friend invited me to go, but I was hesitant at first because I am from another center (I'm from Victory GH, the camp was organized by V-Ubelt). However, being the easiest person to be convinced, I easily said yes without knowing that it's supposed to be for leaders and interns of that church center only. Which I truly understand because there are a lot of church members who want to join and they couldn't accommodate people from other centers because the slots are limited. To cut the long story short, because the pastor in charge agreed to let me join, well... the rest is history. That's one side of the story but, on the other hand, I do believe that this camp was divinely appointed. After all, we don't meet people and go to places by accident, right? :)

So if you know me, and read the things that I write, then you know that I rarely write long blogs. Most of the time, I write micro blogs and post it directly on my FB page @onepromiseaday. But for this one, I'm writing it here because I want to share to you what I learned in my 3-day trip. Not gonna talk about the place, the food and other things, (although they were all superb! I will share some photos later though.) What I will share to you is what God taught and revealed in my heart while I was at the camp.

This year's camp verse is from..

Hebrews 12: 1-2

"let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith."

Day one is probably the most memorable preaching for me. Preached by Ptr. Jojo Henson, he talked about the things that hinder our walk with the Lord.

1. PATTERN OF THINKING

You know what I noticed? each of us has a unique pattern of thinking. It's a human default, to think of a certain way depending on the culture he grew up in, past experiences, or his present circumstances. A person who grew up comfortably will not think the same way as the person who grew up with a family trying hard to make ends meet. Nor a person who has survived cancer will not think or behave the same way as the person who has been healthy all his life. If each of us will be given the same trial in life, we would think or react differently because we have different backgrounds and life experiences.

Ptr. Jojo told a story of a woman who always gets paranoid whenever she feels a discomfort in her body. She would self-diagnose by googling her symptoms and would always think of the worst sickness she could possibly have. She has been in this pattern for quite some time. In return, the information that she feeds her mind stole her peace and worse, this behavior was passed on to her children.

I don’t know what this woman has been through for her thinkng to be shaped this way. Neither do I know her background , but the point is this: Whatever our pattern of thinking is, it is important that we do not have the destructive kind. Negativity like this woman has, is one.

In the words of Ptr. Jojo..

"Negativity is a serious problem if not corrected because it sabotages God's purpose in our lives. In fact, a lot of people don’t get to where God wants them to be because of negativity."

And I absolutely agree. This reminded me of 2 corinthians 10:5 "Take captive of every thought and make it obedient to Christ."

There's a familiar quote that says.. "knowing is winning half the battle" but I'll say "Changing the way we think is winning half the battle" Our minds are our greatest battle fields, and it is also the easiest entry point of the enemy to put fear, lies, and burden in us. That's why it is important to stay grounded to the truth of Jesus, and take captive of every thought and lay it at the feet of Christ.

2. PAST TRAUMA

Ptr Jojo shared a personal story where, an event in his childhood affected his life. His wife noticed that he becomes uncomfortable whenever he sees a drunk man. He later on calls a friend and asks to pray for him. His friend asked, whether he has forgiven his father already, to which he immediately said yes. But the friend insisted that there could still be something lying in his heart that causes his mood to change whenever he sees a drunken man. He prayed, asked the Lord to expose him. It was then that the Holy Spirit caused him to remember an incident from the past with his dad which traumatized him so much.

When we see trauma patients, you would notice that some of them couldn't talk properly. Some of them won't even talk and just do a vacant stare. Its because according to science, when someone is traumatized there's a part of their brain that shuts down. Trauma has levels, but profound trauma is the type where the brain disassociates from the experience. Reason why some patients couldn't consciously recall what happened.

Ptr Jojo's story magnified to me how wise and loving our father in heaven is. As a designer myself, I always make sure that my designs will be beneficial to the users. And it's just amazing, because when the Lord made our brains, he designed it in such a way that it would protect us when our mind struggles to control the intensity of feelings. Thus, the design of the shut down when we experience trauma. I do believe that the Lord caused him to forget. It was God's way of protecting him. He was five.. A kid couldn't live with a traumatic memory. Imagine remembering every detail of that event? It would ruin him. But the Lord in His loving character, caused him to remember only when it is time to let go and heal.

3. VOWS AND PRONOUNCEMENT OF OURSELVES

We must admit, there are vows that we unintentionally make or curses that we mindlessly throw at another person.

I'm not really the kind of person who makes vows. However, I have a friend who made a vow in one of the trying times of her life. Because sometimes we say things we don't mean when we are highly emotional. Well, here's what the Lord exposed to her.

When we make a vow, we become the Lord of our lives. By simply saying "Lord, ibigay mo lang to.. gagawin ko to..." means you are trading places with the One who is really in control. And I must agree with her. After all, we are always in a want to take control of things and situations right?

Vows are made to win the favor of someone. When we do this with the Lord, we are forgetting grace, because grace in its definition is undeserved. Vow is also like a sacrifice, and truth is there's no need for it because the greatest sacrifice was done by Jesus 2,000 years ago. So no, you don’t have to sacrifice anything anymore. And also, we don’t need it because we are children of God. We are already highly favored with or without vows.

Pronouncement of yourself or pronouncement of others over you can be a blessing or a curse. Remember the bible tells us that there is power in our tongue? Proverbs 18:21 The tongue has the power of life and death.

I have to say, the negative things that were spoken to me when I was young, I still remember them til I grew up and worse, they have become my truth. But praise the Lord for saving me, redeeming me and rescuing me from the destructive words spoken to me when I was little.

Dear believers, let us be careful in the words that we speak to others or to ourselves. Intentional or not, words have power to build up or destroy a person. Let us make sure that the words that we speak are spoken with truth and love. And if like me, you were spoken words that tore you apart, let me tell you this: That is not your truth. Your truth is your identity in Jesus. You are saved, loved and redeemed by His blood. Your worth is great and precious in His sight.

PART OF MY HEART THAT THE LORD EXPOSED

Before the session even started, the Lord showed to me Isaiah 41:13. not knowing what the content of that verse was, I checked my bible and here's what it says.

For I am the LORD your God, the one who takes hold of your right hand, who says to you, 'Do not fear, I will help you.'

I honestly didn't mind what the Lord said. It didn't make sense to me at first. So I just wrote it down, and listened to the session that night. At the end of the discussion, we were asked to pick a faux brick, write our name down and ask the Lord for the sin that hinders our race and that we need to let go and throw off.

As I closed my eyes, the Lord showed clearly to me the word F E A R in bold letters and black background.

And of course the Lord is right. Truth is, before the camp I've been worn out by a spell of sleepless nights. A lot of things were bothering me. Remember what the bible says about worry? "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."- Matthew 6:34

Well that's exactly what I did. I did the exact opposite of that. For the past weeks, or even months, I was trying to figure out the cause and effects of the small and big decisions that made or I will make in life. While it is wise to take a step back and analyze how our little decisions affect our future, my motivation wasn't faith. It was fear. The Lord showed that in my heart, fear has chained me, drained me and kept me in bondage. To be fair, the Lord did not fail to provide for me. He even provides so much more than I ask. However, I still worry. Why? because I am a sheep.

I once read a story about a pastor who owns a small flock of sheep that lived happily and contentedly in his extended backyard. His flock were living in a secured fence, they're well fed and have little to fear. But at times when there's a little rabbit jumping through the grass, they would bolt in sheer panic. This is why the Lord likens us to a sheep. It is a quality that they have which is the same with us. We are easily afraid, discouraged and disheartened when we are put in a little uncomfortable or unfamiliar situation.

So I wrote it down in that faux brick while the Lord kept on speaking to me. He said that not only was I like a sheep, but like the Israelites. When the Lord set them free from the slavery of Egyptians, they walked the desert not with confidence but with fear. That's slave mentality. Being afraid all the time when there’s nothing to worry about is a slave mentality. As the Lord spoke to me, I can imagine Jesus speaking to me directly, snapping his fingers, trying to catch my attention from all the noise around me. I imagine Him saying...

"Look at me, look at me.... YOU ARE FREE"

I picked up that brick and wrote the word FEAR. And as we broke that brick in half, and declared that this thing can no longer hinder us, I felt a wall of fear destroyed in my heart. This barrier that has kept me from moving forward is finally broken. That night I knew, that my fears were drowned in His ocean of love... And in my heart I received his promise:

For I am the LORD your God, the one who takes hold of your right hand, who says to you, 'Do not fear, I will help you.'- Isaiah 41:13

If you are reading this post, and you know you have a barrier that keeps you from moving forward, it may be fear, worry, doubt, unforgiveness, traumas, or curses. Lay it at the feet of Jesus and let the Lord once again rescue you, and destroy that barrier so that you can move forward, advance His kingdom and live a life that the Lord wants you to have..

Prayer:

Lord Jesus,

Thank you for your truth that sets us free. Expose what's in my heart God, and give me the strength to face the barrier that enslaves and hinders me. My assurance is You Lord, that you are a God who goes a head of me and whose power is made perfect in my weakness. Today I let go of the things that chain me, I let go of the bondages in my heart. And today I choose to declare that no wall is too big for me. For with your help I can advance against a troop; with You my God I can scale a wall. Today, barriers are broken and starting today, I will live a life of victory! I declare the power of the cross over my life!

In Jesus' name. Amen.

-----------------------------

Introducing my camp team! TEAM THESSALONIKI!!!<3 (PETMALUNIKI) so blessed with their personal testimonies/revelations at the camp too! :) Thanking the Lord for amazing new friends that I gained in this camp. <3 <3 <3